Hello Dear Readers, and welcome to November! I hope you are all well and navigating the stress of these times with ease. Traditionally I would be writing something about gratitude this month since we are looking forward to Thanksgiving. However, since this year is a very different kind of year, I decided that another topic would be more appropriate for the end of 2020- which I have entitled ‘The Year of Compromises’.
Compromise is something that we have had to do a lot in the last eight months. When I think about all of the things that have changed and how those changes have shaped my life, I think about how I can view them positively. It’s tough-I’m not gonna lie-but I like the challenge of rising from every fall-that’s literally what life coaching is all about.
I’m guessing, Dear Reader, that you are also contemplating compromise based on the fact that we are in a pandemic and living in a politically polarized situation. Whether you’re trying to reach some happy medium for Turkey Day or accepting the election outcome, there will be some areas where you will not “get your way”.
Well, even though I’ll have to settle for making SOME of you happy, I’m here to offer tips that I believe help weather the storm of “not quite perfect” that we’re all in right now.
Reframing Compromise:
It All Worked Out: Can you think of a time when you had to compromise, but it turned out for the best? I’m thinking about one night last week when I watched a movie with my husband that was outside my comfort zone, and LOVED it! Small, silly example, I know, but sometimes it’s good to think of something like that to remind us that compromise doesn’t have to be reserved for big-ticket items.
It’s a Bonding Experience: When we can hear another’s point of view, we sometimes find that we have more in common than we thought. It also allows a model where no one gets ALL that they want, so it feels a bit more equally divided.
All or Nothing Rarely Works: For example, If I eat all of the cookies in my house and leave none for anyone else, I lose, and they lose. Even though I “won” by eating all of the cookies, I will probably get sick or need bigger jeans, which would make me sad. On the other hand, if I eat none of the cookies, and they are all left for others, I will feel resentful and, in turn, treat the cookie-eating members of the household poorly. If I compromise and eat half of the cookies, I don’t overdo it, and there are some left for others- a real win.
There’s no question that we’d all love to have everything our way, Dear Reader, but that’s not how life works. I hope my small reminders have helped you think less harshly about any upcoming compromises you have to make and that you can find a happy medium of your own. Take good care.
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